Fifteen,,,And Counting

Fifteen.

I've put him to bed fifteen times tonight.

Each time he gets up, he comes straight to me with a proud grin on his face.  He climbed out of the crib all by himself!  He's proud.

He gives a squeal and hops up and down a few times, his hands flapping joyfully.

I stand up without a word.

"Stay bed?"  he asks.
"Stay bed."  I won't allow myself to say anything else.  I'm trying really hard not to reward his behavior.

I march him back to bed as he repeats, "Stay bed?"  over and over again.
As I put him down, I tell him to stay in bed.
"M'kay," he says.

I return to my chair and wait for him to get up again.  I know that he will.  He is wide awake, and as of right now, so am I.

Sixteen now.  Sixteen times.

I'm thankful that I don't have to work tomorrow.  Once school starts up again, Joe will have this job.

Autism doesn't wear a watch.  It's 24/7.

Our kids don't sleep like others do.  Researchers have looked into it.  Some believe that circadian rhythms are off in people who have autism.  Others believe that it's purely sensory.  At 3:00 am I could care less what's causing it.

Eli was eight years old before he slept through the night.

Lela was almost five.

How many years will it be for Noah?

I hope that he's like his siblings and will sleep better as he gets older.  Eli used to sleep only a couple of hours a night.  He took prescription medicine for about a year, and then we switched to Melatonin, which helps him stay asleep.

Melatonin helps Lela fall asleep fast, but she still wakes at least once almost every night.

Noah has just started Melatonin, and it's not helping.

Seventeen.

And he's so happy.  He doesn't understand why he can't sleep.  To him it's fun.

Eighteen.

I just put him back each time, not speaking.  And I will do this until he learns that getting up is futile.

Nineteen.

I hope this isn't the start of weeks with no sleep.  Joe and I will have to take turns.  Wish us well, and keep reminding me that this too shall pass.